My mind cannot be still. To know that even as I type there are people sorting through files, sitting around a computer screen viewing my sordid past. My mind keeps coming back and wonders of what may come to be in just a few short weeks. To know that anyone and everyone who picks up a newspaper could very well read all about my sinful past. To know that depending on how this turns out it could very well be spread across magazines and the internet.
Yet, in a way that passes all understanding, I’m not upset or in turmoil about what the next few days and weeks may hold.
Philipians Chapter Four, verse seven reads:
7And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
This peace of God, which passeth ALL understanding, is keeping my heart and mind through Christ Jesus. How? Because I’m following verse six.
6Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
And while this doesn’t mean I’ll never think of all that’s taking place, it surely does allow me to reap the benefit of “peace that passeth all understanding”.
If all this had taken place two years ago I would be an absolute basketcase right now. I would be unable to sleep, crying constantly, consumed with fear etc. But thanks to my Saviour and His forgiveness of my sins, while I’m thinking of these things and while I would be ashamed for people to know of my past, I am secure in His love.